My Prison. My Rules.

Living in a cage your entire life is sad. But if you have built that cage yourself, then it’s just stupid.

Still, DIY prisons are quite common. People build them all the time. And they live in them, convincing themselves that they are happy to abide by the limits of their rules.

I am a proud owner of such prison–or cage. Mine is called “Perfectionism.” It has a nice view of the outside world. But for some reason, I can’t get the interior to look nice, no matter how hard I try. I’m never satisfied with it.

One of my many, many flaws, is having an unrealistic image of myself.

In my microscopic mind, I am a genious, one-of-a-kind, super human. I am the chosen one, the hero who will bring salvation to the world. If I do something, I will do it perfectly on my first try. Trial and Error? That is for losers. I do it right, or I never even bother.

I see people around me, pulling off great achievements. But I can do better. Let them wait and see. When the time is perfect, and every particle in the universe is set in place, I’ll make my move. It will be a feast for the eyes, and a tale for non-fiction books. I am sure of it; it is my destiny.

You guys can see where this mindset is taking me.

Abso-FREAKIN-lutely nowhere!

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6 thoughts on “My Prison. My Rules.

    • Yeah, totally…

      Unless, the apocalypse you talked about happens to hit right before I make my move. Then the world will never know what it missed. What a waste! ;__;

  1. I’m a perfectionist, but I’m also a firm believer of eventual perfection. I strive to make my first attempts at anything great, but if they fall slightly short I take note of what’s wrong and improve on it. When such a thing is done in business it’s call Continuous Process Improvement. I’ve implemented such a thing in my entire life, meaning that every single additional attempt at something is more streamlined, better planned (if needed), and far better executed.

    As a writer, I think that’s the right way to look at things. If something’s total garbage, I know I can improve it, because it’s as “simple” as writing it again.

    • If I was like that, I wouldn’t call it a prison. The need to do everything perfectly has kept me from excelling at any thing that needed gradual progression. I severely criticize my first attempt, and then deem myself unfit for such skill or profession. The funny thing is, I used to look down on some people for not being “perfect” at what they do. Well, those guys are quite good now, and have gone places. While I stayed in same freakin spot, feeling all high and mighty -__-

  2. I feel you on that! I hate feeling like everything has to be perfect. I wanted the first draft of my manuscript to be perfect, no editing, no nothing, just full on perfect story from the get-go. Unfortunately, it was far from it šŸ˜€ But it is good to remind myself that things take work to perfect, otherwise, what would be the point? Things would be pretty boring if everything was right from the beginning, and we didn’t have to work at it!

    • I like your way of thinking. You’re right, what’s the point of life if we do everything perfectly? A story is so boring if the hero is a perfect creature. I hope I don’t kill my writing journey at its infancy by insisting to be perfect from the start.

      Let the bad stuff come out first. Then, hopefully, greatness will emerge. šŸ™‚

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